1 September 2016

pecahan cerita (dua)

Semangat kembali menyeruak di dalam dirimu, wahai hati.
Aku tau itu, tapi kau jatuh lagi bukan pagi ini?
dengan kata katanya yang ternyata membuat kau sadar
akan kebetulan kebetulan itu?
Kembali kau merasa kalah,
Jadi sebenarnya ini semua tentang menang atau kalah?
look what you're holding? what exactly you try to find, dear heart?

ayolah.. kau benar benar bosan dengan rutinitas dunia mu, bukan?
Sampai hal ini kau permainkan?
Ini merupakan sebuah permainan?
Sampai kapan?
Sampai kau menyesal?

Dear heart, you're my heart, i have to follow you through 
when will you give me the sign that this is has to be stop?
when will you stop searching for a reason? 
give me one good reason that we need to continue this game. 
im kinnda sick of it.

31 August 2016

pecahan cerita

Teruntuk hati..
aku tau ini sulit untuk di hadapi.
Semua orang pun begitu. mereka mempunyai masalahnya masing masing
tak terkecuali kau.hadapi saja.
toh setiap hari seperti itu, kita hadapi bersama.
semuanya akan berlalu begitu saja, dan terkadang menguap setelah menangis semalaman pada bantal.

hey, dengar..
semua mungkin hanya khayalanmu saja.
ketika kau butuh seseorang untuk mendengarkan mu, kamu menemukan seseorang yang tanpa maksud tertentu - tertarik mendengarkanmu. mungkin ia sedang bosan pula dengan cerita hidupnya - pada waktu itu.
namun ia tidak ada maksud tertentu.
Saat ia menyapamu ketika kau tidak sengaja memikirkannya. itu pun hanya kebetulan. kebetulan yang kebetulan sering terjadi.
Ia dalam rentang waktu tertentu yang -tidak sengaja- datang untuk hanya sekedar melihatmu.
itu hanya kebetulan.
semua orang punya kepentingan. dan dirimu hanya sedikit dari sebagian kepentingannya.
tidak lebih.
ada hal yang menguntungkan dirinya saat ada dirimu. kita sama sama manusia yang memberi arti pada sesamanya. kita barter cerita, barter hal2 yang menguntungan kedua belah pihak.
jadi, kesimpulannya adalah kau hanya mengada ada kan hal yang tidak ada.
kau membuat ada, karena kau menginginkannya.

sekarang pertanyaannya,
Apa kau menginginkannya?

23 August 2016


we all know that all that karmas, happen.
kind of feeling that too late to fix too late to say sorry
we are all human being, we all are broken, we make mistakes. i make mistakes.
i do such foolish things. we dont need to avoiding things that will come anyway to us
so that when the time comes, will we ready?

7 March 2016

talk to you

when we talk
can i just go through your eye not to your heart?
so i don't have to wonder what it is inside?

we will keep busy anyway,
im sure our heart wouldn't bother that much.

28 January 2016

next to me

guarantee i will always beside you.
move with you at the same time
deal with hurt and burned and exhausted
we were different and now we are one

other may think its insane
we once went down and deep indisposed
looking for glorious result we may achieve
gave the last effort to the most priceless gift
to conquer our self from hatred and separation.

most of all we built this to last
most of all we have each other  
the more we fought the more your face stays inside my mind
and above of all its all worth the pain
your name placed in my heart even before i realized

other may think its insane
we once went down and deep indisposed
looking for glorious result we may achieve
gave the last effort to the most priceless gift
to conquer our self from hatred and separation.

you and my memories

My life is supposed to be cute as your eyes
it is supposed to be as nice as drinking morning coffee  
its should be loads of songs and lyrics as i dream of.. 

i was supposed to be your biggest supporter.. lay down by your side 
when you read or do your masterpiece.. our eyes meet sometimes and it has the same meaning 
when you say your dream and i say you will be there someday
i say you will be there someday

hold you all along the road, that kind one of comforting
you like my post and you cant imagine to reply or how to note
funny thing that i dont have to be somebody else when im with you
and you replied so do you

the moment was over, memories still remain,
this cafe still played our song, and how you hold my hand is the only thing i remember..

18 December 2015

money taking control


17 December 2015


I've been watching gossip girl or scandal, their most stories about speculating things.
well it's for real in my real life. we're about to speculate about everything.

11 December 2015

dare to dream

Do you dare to dream?
i have a dream, one dream.
im but too scared even to think about it


brain wont stop working and rolling. need coffee but i have gastro issue. have to finish all of this. but its extremely hard to start. its 5pm already. youre complaining and you dont take complaint, sometime its about my bos or else.
rain is always coming these days. i havent see any single rainbow after the rain. i missed my father. i dont know him well. i want to know him well. as he want to know me better i suppose.
do you know, cheating is easy. breaking is easy. maintain is hard. love is just a feeling we wont take to the grave. so just let it go. feel and let it go. dont have to make it so complicated. but still keep watching if theres text coming through phone.
always try to solve everybodys problem. everybodys case. so wheres my case? wheres my cigarette? wheres my shelter? wheres the shoulders? wheres those eyes?
be good. as a person, be a SINCERE. we've tried. we work then we go home. at the time and at late. and at so very late.